The fine art of making people feel special

The fine art of making people feel special –

“Wow, that is a really interesting idea!”

Arjun looked attentively at Isha. “I had never thought about it that way. What made you consider it?”

Isha smiled. “Well, I’ve thought about it for some time and then I discussed it with my colleagues recently who also thought the idea had potential. I’m glad you liked it, do you want to hear more about how I think it could work?

Arjun nodded. “Yes please, that would be really helpful.”

This short story is an example of the fine art of making people feel special.

Just like in the conversation above, wouldn’t you agree that it’s wonderful when someone really sees and hears you, takes interest in your ideas, appreciates your input and values your contribution? Simply put, isn’t it great when someone makes you feel special?

We have all been given the ability to make other people feel special.

It’s pretty cool ability to have

And the results we achieve when making others feel special is pretty special too – it energises, it engages, it makes others want to go that extra mile, it makes people want to help and support. Yes, it’s pretty cool.

There are numerous ways to practice this fine art of making people feel valued and special. Here are some of our recommendations on how to do it:

  • Be genuinely interested in the other person. Be curious about them. Recognise and remember that everyone has something unique to contribute (the combination of their experience, ideas, knowledge, skills etc)
  • Stay 100% present. Don’t think about your next meeting, don’t glance at your phone, but really give the person in front of you your full attention. They’re deserve it.
  • Thank them for their input, and if possible, highlight how it will make a difference. Recognise that they have made a unique and valuable contribution.
  • Use the word “and” instead of “but” if disagreeing with what they say. (Eg. “Great idea, and how would that work in practice?” instead of “Great idea, but I don’t think it would work.”) “And” builds bridges while “but” builds walls. And great collaboration and great results need bridges between people.

So, practice that fine art – make someone feel special today!

About the authors

Mandy Flint & Elisabet Vinberg Hearn, award-winning authors of ”The Team Formula” and ”Leading Teams – 10 Challenges: 10 Solutions”, published by Financial Times International and a practical tool for building winning teams. They are currently writing their third book about Leadership Impact.

You can download a free chapter of “Leading Teams 10 Challenge 10 Solutions” here

Praise for ”Leading Teams”: This book is really, and literally, something else. Not the usual management fad. Instead, here is a manual with troubleshooting instructions within. I love that suggested solutions are taken down to what behaviours to display to make the solution come to life. The exemplifications of problems are spot on, and you can immediately recognize and relate to them. I and my team have worked a lot with creating team accountability and efficiency, and with the help of this manual we can continue to work with it on our own. My team members will get a copy as soon as the book is out”  Håkan Nyberg, Chief Executive Officer, Nordnet Bank

Author: Excellence in Leadership

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